Really.

Someone recently said how difficult this week has been and I laughed...then cried.  It really has been an incredibly difficult week, but hey, the year hasn't exactly been a picnic.  I always try to focus on the blessings, but the challenges really are overshadowing the blessings right now.  I know they don't but I am straining to see the sunshine.

In the last six weeks, I lost my dad with whom my relationship was strained, Will was in the hospital for a week, my 4 months of crutches ended in surgery, Will was just readmitted to MCV, and that night the incision of my foot reopened and I ended up in the ER of the same hospital as Will. 

I know that we will get through this.  I know that while Will is really ill, I will get to take my child home and he will talk to me.  A lot of parents don't have that opportunity.  Does that make today easier?  Not really.  I have other children whom I don't get to see, a husband who is stressed taking care of those children (with Erlene's help) and trying to work, a son who is angry that he is once again in the hospital when he really just wants to go home, and I am dealing with life in a hospital while still non-weight bearing and on crutches. 

I am thankful for the fact that my family does have meals in the fridge thanks to the generosity of friends.  That does make Billy's life more manageable and the nutrition of my children a little safer in my absence.  I am thankful that a wonderful doc is on service and Dr T is not on vacation.  I am thankful for insurance. 

But today.  It is just raining in my world and I would love to see some sunshine.