Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Let's Make a Deal

I chatted with a friend tonight about the articles posted below and about daily life in the Coleman home. Before she got on the line, her husband answered and asked how we were doing. I simply laughed and told him that I frequently chose to not answer that question anymore. :) As I've said before, and I quote from Thumper's dad, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all."

So, let's make a deal. I'll simply post here how things are sorta going, and when you want to know, you can sorta read between the lines and get a brief synopsis of our daily life...and then you will not leave befuddled when I refuse to verbalize what is happening in our life. Does that work? I don't mean to ignore your question. I know that, for the most part, you really want to know. But I often can't answer without crying. When you ask me, it means I have to look at the big picture in order to answer honestly and if I look at the big picture, I'm totally overwhelmed.. and so I cry. Perfectly normal response, right? (Ok. I know it's not, but we are making a deal here, right? So this response is your concession to me!) :)

Yes, our family is struggling. Billy is working very long hours, is exhausted, and is not available by phone the majority of the time. Andrew got his license and is now working more than full time at Kings Dominion as a lifeguard. Chris is working a few hours a week at a local day lily farm and learning how to become a photographer. Will is struggling. Camden is mostly coping (and facing a birthday where he wants a Golden Retriever puppy...anyone know of one for really cheap???). Benjamin and Caroline are the dangerous duo. Me? Well, I plead the fifth. Let's just say that single parenting, home schooling, managing Will's illness, feeling crummy thanks to the new meds and not being able to run for the last three months, and trying to work miracles in a budget to allow for another long distance doctor's appt has left me a bit...weary. The children's hearts are struggling in very real ways and that has zapped the last bit of emotional energy that I might have had. That's simple honesty. God has given me more than I can handle and I really don't know what to do with it anymore. And, in general, I don't wanna talk about it. :)

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